Spiritual Practices can be whatever you want them to be

As I have been exploring spirituality in different ways this year, I keep coming across posts and articles and podcasts about spiritual practices, and so many of them sound the same. Stereotypically, there is the lighting of candles, meditation, and sitting in silence, often veganism. There is a sense of pride that comes through, sometimes, when people talk about their spiritual practices. We’ve all seen the yoga culture, the lotus pose, the serene gaze as the slim woman looks out across the ocean, the chanting.

When you’re in the midst of this spiritual community, there’s a temptation to assume these same spiritual practices for yourself as though the practices themselves hold some kind of magic. Easy to think, maybe if I meditate everyday and do yoga, (and become a vegan, and wear all-white and take instagram photos of my beautifully lit candle), I’ll have peace… or whatever it is that you’re seeking.

Listen – a spiritual practice can be whatever you want it to be.

All the spiritual practices are more or less trying to help you attain the same thing: a deeper awareness of who you are beyond this mind-body human form. And by that, I mean getting to a place where your mind is quiet and “empty,” but “empty” like space/universe is empty – seemingly black and infinite but containing a depth of existence unfathomable and yet unexplored.

The only spiritual practice I would highly advise anyone to try is sitting in silence. For as long as you can as often as you can. That said, I don’t actually do that all that often for any length of time. And the annoyingly awesome thing is that many spiritual gurus will tell you that as soon as you feel like you “have” to do anything to become more spiritual, you have strayed from the path. So, even the thought that you “need” to sit in silence or “should” sit in silence defeats the purpose of you actually sitting in silence.

Anyway, my point is that all the other spiritual practices essentially point to the same awareness sitting in silence points to. The beauty and difference, for me, of sitting in silence as opposed to other approaches, is that sitting in silence embodies being-ness. Doing nothing, just existing. And, shockingly, a lot of spiritual growth can come of that.

On this journey, I have longed to hear about what other people were doing – like, normal people – for their spiritual practices. I was not interested in the standard stuff that I kept reading about: mindful eating, yoga, long nature walks, etc. etc. All those things are lovely, but they didn’t really do it for me. And, because of how spirituality has become a “culture,” you can easily feel like even more of an oddball if you’re not waving the incense and dancing to raise your vibe all the time. So, here are a few things I have experienced/cultivated/tried that helped me tap into that deeper awareness beyond myself:

1. Sitting in silence.

As mentioned above, this can bring about a surprising amount of spiritual insight and growth. There is nothing fancy about it. It can be done almost anywhere at any time. I have sat in silence on my bathroom floor, leaning my back against the cabinets. I have sat in silence in my living room amongst legos and dried cat puke. I have done it outside on my back porch, in my car, on a park bench… It is easily the simplest of all practices but the most challenging because there’s nothing else to distract you. Watching your mind do its crazy monkey dance is wild and weird and challenging at first. The best advice I heard was from Cynthia Bourgeault who said that you have to sit in silence for at least 20-30 minutes before your mind calms down. But, if you can get even 5 minutes of quiet, that 5 minutes will be priceless to your spiritual life. My trick is that I mentally say one word (“peace”) to help re-focus my mind when it goes crazy. It’s not a mantra – I don’t repeat it endlessly – I only say it when I notice my mind racing off on some tangent. If you sit for long enough, you will hit a point where the word and thoughts disappear and there is just…. nothingness. You’re conscious but not thinking, and it is the best rest in the world.

2. Watering the lawn.

Our backyard sprinklers got disconnected somehow this summer and so I took to watering our dry backyard with the hose. Watching the water droplets sparkling in the sunlight was mesmerizing and I found it to be the best practice in being in the moment. My mind became so focused on the grass that all other thoughts fell away. I felt as though I could see the grass becoming greener, the blades standing taller and stronger. It helped me understand why people say that gardening has a similar effect. While this didn’t “empty” my mind, necessarily, I was so intently focused on the present that it felt like I was giving my mind a break from all the other thoughts.

3. “Dissolving.”

This is a relatively new thing for me, one I came across while reading “The power of now” by Eckhart Tolle. I was trying to figure out whether I needed to be more connected to my body. In one of the chapters, he talks about feeling the “inner body;” becoming more aware of it. Basically, you tune your awareness deeply within yourself to where you can sense your body without it being an external sensation. I’m not explaining it well, but it reminded me of how an amputee might feel… having the sensation of a missing body part even though it’s not there. Anyway, I laid in bed one night, trying to sense my inner body and it resulted in this exercise I think of as “dissolving” my edges. I lie in my bed with my arms down at my sides but not touching my body anywhere else. I close my eyes and try to picture my body in my mind and concentrate on that inner sensation, bringing all my awareness deep into myself. Then I imagine my body becoming one with the darkness, dissolving into the darkness behind my closed eyes. It’s almost like I can feel my body ceasing to exist and just being part of everything else. I no longer have edges, no more boundaries that separate me from anything. It’s a melting away of this form I call “my body.” Not because I hate it or have issues, but because I am experimenting with the idea that whatever I am, “I” am beyond this mind-body human form.

4. Above & Below

This is another new one that came from a guided meditation I listened to. Typically, whenever we lay down or look at the sky, we are aware of the vast expanse above us. BUT a fun exercise is to imagine the immense expanse below you as well. This visual image creates a sensation of being sandwiched between expanses, suspended in the grace of this amazing world. It’s also neat to walk around with this image in mind, too, keeping a tiny bit of awareness on the fact that there are thousands of miles under your feet as well. This feels spiritual to me because it reminds me of how much I don’t know, cannot possibly comprehend, and how my existence in this world is far less significant than I generally treat it. I become aware of the earth around me and a strange gratitude and comfort arises that buoys me up inside and gives me a floating sensation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I’d love to know what your “spiritual practices” are, however common or unique they may be, I think we are all helped and encouraged by knowing what activities or exercises draw each other closer and deeper into an awareness beyond ourselves. Because, really, we are all deep calling to deep; awareness experiencing itself. What a beautiful image of God calling to it’s God-self in human form, and that God-self responding in it’s individual way. Like wildflowers turning towards the same sun, blooming in different stages, heights, colors, forms, each unique but bedded in the same soil and reaching for the same light.